Going off the grid for two months – or at least pretending to – undoubtedly slowed the flow of gold and captured souls into the subterranean lair where Kris Jenner slumbers. So at the beginning of 2017, Kim Kardashian began her social media return and from January 3 to January 11, she posted a series of photos to Instagram that appeared to show her family living in a stark, minimalist house in the 1980s to further sell the impression that her life is, like, forever changed. Naturally, this turned out to be bullshit after Buzzfeed did some digging and discovered that the photos were actually taken at Rick Rubin’s Shangri-La studio. Which means Kim and Kanye are still living in their mansion in Calabasas and not a goddamn thing has changed because here she is doing the butt stroll in Dubai yesterday.
Kim Kardashian Shows Off Her Old Curves In Dubai (PHOTOS) https://t.co/M7aOU4xfAH
— TMZ (@TMZ) January 15, 2017
Needless to say, everyone involved was super thrilled to be called on their shit:
When reached for confirmation that the Wests were at Shangri-La, a representative for Rubin said, “I think it’s most appropriate for this to be answered by Kim or Kanye’s representatives.” But publicists for the couple did not reply to BuzzFeed News’ request.
I’ve been at this job for almost 10 years now, and there’s one adage that I keep repeating that’s never served me wrong: “The opposite of whatever a Kardashian says is always true.” For example, are those kids even real? I mean, I see Kanye holding them. But is he even real? If I close my eyes, does somebody rush in and fix the popsicle sticks holding him together? More importantly, if I strike the ground in front of Kris Jenner with a staff and yell, “You shall not pass!” does that even work? She’s got a fire whip thingy, so I dunno about all that.