Why Listening is the Most Radical Act

Pain and suffering may often seem to be calling us to jump in and fix things, but perhaps they are asking us first to be still enough to hear what can really help, what can truly get to the cause of this suffering, what will not only eliminate it now but prevent it from returning. So, before we act, we need to listen. When we do become quiet enough and “listen up,” the way opens, and we see the possibilities for action.

We give very little attention to learning to listen, learning to really hear another person or situation. Yet think back to the moments with other people when our hearts were engaged and we felt fed by being together. In those moments, weren’t we hearing one another? In times like those, when we have listened to and heard one another, we have felt life arising from a shared perspective.

Why we miss new opportunities

Each situation, each moment of life, is new. We and this other person or group of people have never been here before. Oh, we’ve been in moments like it, but the present moment is new even if we have performed the same action with the same person hundreds of times before. Of course, it’s easy to think, “Well, it’s just like the last time, so I’ll do what I did last time,” and then not have to listen to the new moment. But if we do that, our lives become boring replications of what we have always done before, and we miss the possibilities of surprise, of new and more creative solutions, of mystery.

For our often humdrum lives to retain the taste of living truth, we have to listen freshly—again and again.

For our often humdrum lives to retain the taste of living truth, we have to listen freshly—again and again. A human interaction includes both the uniqueness of each being and the unity of the two, which transcends the separateness. For our minds to take such a subtle process and trivialize it to “just this again” or “nothing but that” is to reduce us to automatons, to objects for one another. And for action to be compassionate, we need to eliminate the idea of object, we need to be here together doing exactly what needs to be done in the simplest way we can. We need to listen.

How mindful listening leads to real change

When we begin to act by listening, the rest follows naturally. It’s not so easy, of course—it requires us to give up preconceived ideas, judgments, and desires in order to allow space to hear what is being said. True listening requires a deep respect and a genuine curiosity about situations as well as a willingness just to be there and share stories. Listening opens the space, allows us to hear what needs to be done in that moment. It also allows us to hear when it is better not to act, which is sometimes a hard message to receive.

Listening to others clearly opens the way to understanding the helping situation. But listening to others requires quieting some of the voices that already exist within us.

There are many people and organizations teaching techniques for clear active listening and appreciating the role of listening in the process of change. One such group is Rural Southern Voice for Peace, which has developed The Listening Project, a process by which members of grass-roots groups go door to door or to familiar gathering places as they are beginning a project. They ask “open-ended questions in a non-judgmental but challenging way that encourages people to share their deepest thoughts” about the area of the group’s concern. They report that “remarkable things happen as this process unfolds: Activists empathize with former ‘opponents,’ replacing negative stereotypes with understanding and concern; barriers are overcome as both sides experience common ground and see each other as human beings with deeply held hopes and fears. People being surveyed feel affirmed, sensing that what the listeners really want is to know their opinions; some start to change their opinions as they explore, often for the first time, their deeper feelings about social problems.”

Listening to others clearly opens the way to understanding the helping situation. But listening to others requires quieting some of the voices that already exist within us. When this happens, there is space not only for the voices of others but for our own truest voice. And, as Alice Walker has said, “The inner voice can be very scary sometimes. You listen, and then you go ‘Do whut?’ I don’t wanna do that! But you still have to pay attention to it.”

How meditation helps us listen to others

We need to take time to quiet down and listen to ourselves with attention—not only in the midst of action but when we are alone, walking in the woods, making tea, praying in church, fishing in a stream, or sitting in meditation. A simple breath meditation can be helpful, because it returns us to a basic connection with the world. As we breathe in and out, and bring our awareness gently to our breath, we are experiencing the world coming into us and ourselves going back out into the world. We are reminded, in a simple physical way, that we are not separate from the world but continually interacting with it in the very makeup of our being.

When we listen for the truth of a moment, we know better what to do and what not to do, when to act and when not to act.

We need to listen fully. It’s the basis of all compassionate action. Such full listening helps us hear who is calling and what we can do in response. When we listen for the truth of a moment, we know better what to do and what not to do, when to act and when not to act. We hear that we are all here together, and we are all we’ve got.

 

This article was adapted from Compassion in Action: Setting Out on the Path of Service by Ram Dass and Mirabia Bush

 

 

Wholehearted Listening: How we listen affects how we are heard

 

Stop, Wait, Go

The post Why Listening is the Most Radical Act appeared first on Mindful.

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31 Stars Who Will Make You Feel Great About Turning 40 This Year

If you’re one of the many people turning the big 4-0 this year, you’re not alone. This Is Us costars Milo Ventimiglia and Justin Hartley are both hitting the big milestone this year, as are musicians Kanye West, Chris Martin, and John Mayer. In addition to sharing the same birthday, John Cena and Kal Penn are also turning 40 along with Tom Brady, Jessica Chastain, and Liv Tyler. If we didn’t know any better, we’d say these stars have found the fountain of youth.

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February 2017 Movies You Should Go See

February 2017 Movies You Should Go See – We discuss the upcoming movies for the month of February 2017 and give our picks for what to see in theaters each week. The Space Between Us https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AFjJ7Itetgk Rings https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x_yuHYNqa0w The Comedian https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ALlj3RRF9h8 Fifty Shades Darker https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oQCyZKsT82M John Wick: Chapter 2 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ChpLV9AMqm4 The LEGO Batman Movie https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rGQUKzSDhrg A United Kingdom https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pX5vI4osR50 The Great Wall https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=avF6GHyyk5c A Cure for Wellness https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WkTFfmm5ZFQ Fist Fight https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6YVBj2o_3mg Get Out https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sRfnevzM9kQ Collide https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p7yt_t3nZKA Rock Dog https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UVwFM2PukSE Tulip Fever https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=omOWlPASLq4 All videos on Screen Time are created or co-produced with partners from the BBTV Network. Video by Screen Time Partner: https://www.youtube.com/user/bosslevel8 CONNECT WITH US!! Twitter https://twitter.com/bosslevel8 Facebook http://ift.tt/1zWXuQi MORE VIDEOS FROM SCREEN TIME ====================================================== LOGAN | Official Trailer #2 Reaction & Review – Screen Time https://youtu.be/tGScsc_-rGU POWER RANGERS Official Trailer #2 Reaction & Review – Screen Time https://youtu.be/Vq_Jx4S2otE Top 10 Best Trailers of December 2016 Review https://youtu.be/otR_42BhaqY Which Alien Series Trailer is the Best? (1 2 3 4 Prometheus or Covenant) https://youtu.be/s-qxVrQefdM Blade Runner 2049 Teaser Trailer Reaction & Review https://youtu.be/TSkhRi474lk Top 10 2017 Psychological Thrillers You Want To Know About 👁👁 https://youtu.be/2p-Y93V_a-k You Won’t Believe Who’s Making SHOWTIME SHOWS in 2017 https://youtu.be/ExnQlLs5Iyg What’s Coming to HBO in 2017 and will they SUCK https://youtu.be/J2Q_l80w0tI Amazon’s NEW 2017 Shows are ACTUALLY GOOD? https://youtu.be/MMSmfx40Hm8 Music by Epidemic Sound (http://ift.tt/19pXSrH)

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All 15 Oscar Nominated Short Films Playing in Theaters in February

All 15 Oscar Nominated Short Films

This is exciting news! ShortsHD, an online short film channel, has announced that they have partnered with Magnolia Pictures to release all 15 Academy Award nominated short films in theaters starting this February. The shorts program will be playing on over 500 screens across the United States, Canada, Europe and Latin America starting on February 10th, 2017. They will be screening the Live-Action Short Films, Animated Short Films, and Documentary Short Films nominated for Oscars, which includes Pixar’s Piper as well as The White Helmets documentary. This is the perfect way to see all of these acclaimed short films, instead of trying to find them online. The Oscar ceremony takes place on Sunday, February 26th in about a month.

This marks the 12th consecutive year of the Oscar nominated short films theatrical experience and is the only opportunity for audiences to watch the nominated short films prior to the 89th Academy Awards at the end of the month. "This year’s Oscar Nominated Shorts are formidable storytelling at its best," said Carter Pilcher, CEO of ShortsHD, the network behind the annual theatrical screenings. "Short films are exploding in popularity around the globe, and these Oscar noms are the pinnacle—and ShortsHD’s theatrical release is the only way to see this year’s Live Action, Animation and Documentary shorts nominees on the big screen, a delight for movie fans the world over." The 15 nominated shorts from 2016 are:

DOCUMENTARY SHORT:
4.1 Miles (USA) – Directed by Daphne Matziaraki
Extremis (USA) – Directed by Dan Krauss
Joe’s Violin (USA) – Directed by Kahane Cooperman & Raphaela Neihausen
Watani: My Homeland (UK) – Directed by Marcel Mettelsiefen & Stephen Ellis
The White Helmets (UK) – Directed by Orlando von Einsiedel & Joanna Natasegara

ANIMATED SHORT:
Blind Vaysha (Canada) – Directed by Theodore Ushev
Borrowed Time (Canada) – Directed by Andrew Coats & Lou Hamou-Lhadj
Pear Cider and Cigarettes (UK/Canada) – Directed by Robert Valley & Cara Speller
Pearl (USA) – Directed by Patrick Osborne
Piper (USA) – Directed by Alan Barillaro & Marc Sondheimer

LIVE-ACTION SHORT:
Ennemis Intérieurs (France) – Directed by Sélim Azzazi
La Femme et le TGV (Switzerland) – Directed by Timo von Gunten & Giacun Caduff
Silent Nights (Denmark) – Directed by Aske Bang & Kim Magnusson
Sing (Hungary) – Directed by Kristof Deák & Anna Udvardy
Timecode (Spain) – Directed by Juanjo Giménez

To see the complete list of 2017 Academy Award nominations, click here. Google joined the list of Academy Award contenders this year with the animation short film Pearl, a Google Spotlight Story from Patrick Osborne, the director of Disney’s Oscar-nominated short film Feast. Netflix scored its first-ever short film Academy Award nominations with Documentary Short films Extremis and The White Helmets. Also in the Documentary Short category, 3 of the 5 nominees tackle the Syrian crisis. For a sneak peak at The Oscar Nominated Short Films 2017 program, visit their official website. The shorts will be shown in theaters in 3 different programs, highlighting the 3 different sections, throughout February. Go support the filmmakers.

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Anastasia Ashley’s Ass of the Day

Here’s some Anastasia Ashley showing off her watch…letting you all know that she is always island time….because she’s worried about you forgetting the reason she’s always in a bikini as she lives her her tropical life….because I know you’re staring at her damn watch…because it’s right next to her iconic fucking ass..

I wish I took this picture….because not because I am a pervert because I have a passion for product shots so long as the product is next to a butt of the surfer with the best surfer butt….it’s what I tried to go to art school for..but it was the 90s…they didn’t see the vision I saw…and here I am practically homeless…when I could have been so much more…a visionary…

That said…I wonder why she’s so dirty…someone better call her a doctor…to look into that…or at least hose her down….

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Cashmere Cat Announces 2017 Tour

Cashmere Cat Announces 2017 Tour

Cashmere Cat has announced a massive new tour for 2017. It includes dates across North America, including appearances at Buku, Firefly, Forecastle, and Panorama music festivals. Check out the full list of dates below. Cashmere Cat’s debut studio album Wild Love is due out later this year. So far, the producer has shared the title track (featuring the Weeknd and Francis and the Lights), “Trust Nobody” with Selena Gomez and Tory Lanez, and most recently “Throw Myself a Party,” featuring 2 Chainz and Tory Lanez.

Cashmere Cat:

02-17 Washington, D.C. – 9:30 Club
03-11 New Orleans, LA – Buku Music & Art Project
04-09 Phoenix, AZ – Phoenix Lights
04-12 Dallas, TX – The Loft
04-13 Austin, TX – Empire Garage
04-15 Atlanta, GA – Terminal West
04-17 Carrboro, NC – Cat’s Cradle
04-18 Richmond, VA – The National
04-20 Boston, MA – Royale
04-21 Burlington, VT – Higher Ground
04-22 Philadelphia, PA – Union Transfer
04-25 Pittsburgh, PA – Rex Theatre
04-26 Urbana, IL – Canopy Club
04-27 Madison, WI – Majestic Theatre
04-28 Minneapolis, MN – The Loft
04-29 Kansas City, MO – Riot Room
05-02 Salt Lake City, UT – Urban Lounge
05-03 Boise, ID – Neurolux
05-04 Portland, OR – Wonder Ballroom
05-05 Seattle, WA – Showbox
05-06 Eugene, OR – WOW Hall
05-09 Sacramento, CA – Harlow’s
05-10 San Luis Obispo, CA – Fremont Theatre
05-11 Santa Barbara, CA – EOS Lounge
05-12 Los Angeles, CA – Wiltern
05-13 San Diego, CA – Observatory North Park
06-17 Dover, DE – Firefly Music Festival
06-29 Rothbury, MI – Electric Forest
07-15 Louisville, KY – Forecastle Festival
07-30 New York, NY – Panorama Music & Arts Festival

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The Heartbreaking Reason Queen Elizabeth II Won’t Be Celebrating Her Sapphire Jubilee

Why Isn’t Queen Elizabeth Celebrating Her Sapphire Jubilee?

The Heartbreaking Reason Queen Elizabeth II Won’t Be Celebrating Her Sapphire Jubilee

Queen Elizabeth II is on the cusp of reaching a rare and important milestone, but don’t expect to see her celebrating anytime soon. As the country’s longest-reigning monarch, she’ll have the distinction of becoming the first British sovereign to mark 65 years on the throne on Feb. 6, her Sapphire Jubilee. Although she went all out for her Diamond Jubilee in 2012, this year will be a much more somber occasion for a very significant reason. In an interview with The Telegraph, the queen’s former press secretary, Dickie Arbiter, explained the heartbreaking meaning behind the 65th anniversary. “It’s important to understand that for the queen this marks the anniversary of the day her father died,” he said. “She has always made it clear that her long reign is a consequence of her father’s early death and so it is not a day for celebration. She will go to church the day before and her father will be in her thoughts then. On the day itself, she will do her red boxes but she won’t be going out and about anywhere.”

The queen will reportedly spend the day at her Sandringham country estate, which is where her father, King George VI, spent his last days before dying in his sleep due to complications from lung cancer on Feb. 6, 1952. The royal family’s 90-year-old matriarch, who has experienced health problems herself lately, will likely treat the occasion as business as usual, going through her famous red boxes and remaining in “quiet reflection” rather than engaging in any public events. The decision echoes her reaction to surpassing Queen Victoria as the longest-reigning monarch in 2015, when she politely revealed that the historic record was “not one to which I have ever aspired.” Regardless of her choice not to publicly celebrate, the Royal Mint has created a collection of commemorative £5 coins to honor the Sapphire Jubilee. Each is engraved with a quote from the speech she gave on her 21st birthday while on a family tour of South Africa in 1947, when she was still just a princess: “My whole life, whether it be long or short, shall be devoted to your service.”

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This Haunting Justin Timberlake Dance Tribute Will Have You Crying a River of Tears

“Cry Me a River” Justin Timberlake Dance Tribute Video

This Haunting Justin Timberlake Dance Tribute Will Have You Crying a River of Tears

Acclaimed choreographer Andrew Winghart paid the ultimate tribute to Justin Timberlake on Tuesday, which marked the singer’s 36th birthday. He released a dance short inspired by Justin’s iconic 2002 hit “Cry Me a River,” performed by 37 professional dancers; the featured male, George Lawrence II, along with a group of 36 females — a “forceful river of women” — combine to illustrate “his emotional journey echoing his indifference at having a broken heart.”

Explaining his inspiration for the short, Andrew said, “I stumbled upon the song through my iTunes shuffle and was instantly captivated by memories of loving this piece as an 11-year-old. I was struck by how modern and timeless the song felt and knew right away I wanted to choreograph a tribute piece that did the song justice through dance.” Watch the stunning video above now.

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25 Of The Biggest Lies Told By Parents

Everybody knows that parents bend the truth a little bit. From Santa Claus to the tooth fairy, there are some things that we all eventually realize were unfortunately not true. But those aren’t the only ones as there are certainly several other good examples as well. These are 25 of the biggest lies told by parents!

25

“If you cross your eyes, they’ll stay that way.”

girl-eyes-crossed

Image: pixabay (public domain)

Challenge accepted

24

“If you don’t get good grades, you’ll end up homeless.”

doctor

Image: www.pexels.com (adapted from; public domain)

You know what they call the last person in the class to graduate from medical school? …Doctor.

23

“If you don’t put on a coat, you will catch a cold.”

winter

Image: pixabay.com (public domain)

You don’t get sick because you’re cold. You get sick because of a virus or bacteria. Bacteria hate the cold, and viruses are only transmitted through other people. So technically, if you want to not get sick you shouldn’t wear a coat. In fact, you shouldn’t wear anything. You should cryogenically freeze yourself and go as far away from other people as possible. But that might be a bit much to explain to mom.

22

“Do whatever you want.”

threat

This is not permission, this is a threat.

21

"Santa is tired of of milk and cookies. He’d much rather have Doritos and beer."

santaclaus

Source: 22words.com

20

“We’re leaving in 5 minutes.”

clock

Image: pixabay.com (public domain)

You said that 30 minutes ago.

19

“Here comes the airplane.”

spinach

Lies. It’s just spinach.

18

“We’ll see.”

no

Image: pixabay.com (public domain)

That’s a no.

17

“Everything will be fine.”

thumbs up

Image: pixabay.com (public domain)

Unfortunately, that’s not how life works.

16

“You can be anything you want to be.”

santa

Image: commons.wikimedia.org (adapted from; public domain)

Well, I don’t want to be anything.

15

“If you go out with your hair wet, you’ll catch a cold.”

wet hair

Image: pixabay.com (public domain)

As we already said, you get sick from being indoors and in close proximity to other people. The wetness of your hair has nothing to do with it.

14

“If you’re nice to people, they’ll be nice to you.”

nice

Sometimes

13

“The crust has the most nutritional value.”

bread

Well played mom, well played.

12

“I’m only going to buy milk.”

groceries

…And she comes back with half the grocery store.

11

“That’s nice dear.”

deer

She didn’t even look.

10

“I’ll think about it.”

10

Image: pixabay.com (public domain)

It’s a no.

9

"Just ignore the bullies.”

bully

And keep getting bullied?

8

“Eating carrots will help you see better.”

carrots

Image: commons.wikimedia.org (public domain)

No they won’t; that was World War II propaganda mom.

7

“When kids make fun of you, they’re just jealous.”

jealousy

Of what?

6

"I’ll hold onto your savings just in case of an emergency."

money

This one can be pretty sleazy, but there are parents out there that do this.

5

“I have eyes in the back of my head.”

eye

Who would actually believe this?

4

"I know what I’m doing."

knowledge

It may take a while, but you eventually realize just how little your parents actually knew.

3

“Dinner’s ready.”

dinner

Image: pixabay.com (public domain)

Now set the table.

2

“You’re such a handsome boy!”

mother

Image:pixabay.com (public domain)

Because what else are they supposed to say?

 

If you’ve enjoyed this post, be sure to check out 25 Most Ridiculous Lies Parents Actually Tell Their Kids.

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Would You Rather: Ryan Reynolds or Ryan Gosling?

Ryan Reynolds and Ryan Gosling Hotness Poll

Would You Rather: Ryan Reynolds or Ryan Gosling?

This award season has been all about the Ryans, and we’re loving every second. We all fangirled over Ryan Reynolds and Ryan Gosling‘s casual meetup at the 2017 Critics’ Choice Awards, but it’s time to decide: who is your favorite? To settle the score once and for all, we’ve compiled a simple game of Would You Rather? Vote now to see which Ryan is the hottest in Hollywood.

Image Source: Getty / Jeff Kravitz

Who would you rather in glasses?

Who would you rather wearing a newsboy hat?

Who would you rather shirtless?

Who would you rather in a suit?

Who would you rather sitting in a chair?

Who would you rather looking pensive?

Who would you rather wearing flannel?

Who would you rather waving goodbye?

Who would you rather laughing?

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